Sunday, 30 May 2010


The third anniversary of my fall sort of passed me by. I forgot all about it on the day, but I realised I'd missed it last week yet haven't written. It feels a bit false reflecting for the sake of it. Though that's often the way I spend time, thinking for the sake of thinking. Let's leave it, for now. The year has been wonderful. It has been full of change.

I am tired after the joys of Eurovision last night and I am at a bit of a loss as to how to tell you about the last few weeks. Since Easter life has got progressively more stressful and it isn't going to let up until the end of June. The next month might be pretty fucking miserable in patches, actually, but I have at least come to the conclusion that it won't RUIN EVERYTHING (with wringing of apron and mad stare) and that life will continue.

Also, June is full of amazing things to anticipate, so I will cease to be grumpy about the stress and just get a decent night's sleep and look forward to the bright moments.

Wednesday, 12 May 2010

things I want to do (part i)

John Soane's house
the Dove pub in Hammersmith
rugby match at Twickenham (I've done this, but he hasn't)
Portobello Market (haven't been since I was sixteen, and I live twenty minutes away)
Bea's of Bloomsbury for afternoon tea (in my head it's a bit like a British Angelina's)
Gray's Market (antiques!)
catch the first tube home in the morning
yOyO at Notting Hill Arts Club on Thursday nights
go to Ginglik more
Tower of London/Crown Jewels
buy something in Liberty's

Monday, 3 May 2010


"Why do you have a post-it with be accountable on it?"
I hesitate. "Let me finish drying my hair."

How did I forget to take that down? I run my hands through my hair, heat delaying my response, thinking through how I'll explain it.

I switch off the hairdryer. "Well?"
"Well. I put on a few pounds since Christmas" I have, hardly anything but I don't want it to be the start of an upward trend "and I know you don't notice, but it's just there to remind me. Don't sit at your desk and eat rubbish."
His eyes on me I go to him.

Later we're eating an amazing lunch and sharing a bottle of white. They clear the main course and I lean close to him and say I don't know if you meant to make me feel lovely, earlier, but you did.

Oh, and how.