"You're the worst kind of high maintenance. You think you're low maintenance but you're not." EA has told me this more times than I care to remember. It's whip-smart true, a rising welt of character assassination.
I repeat this to my boyfriend (perhaps we should name him) as I follow him up the stairs in a book shop, searching for a long-ordered vegetarian cookbook. I fall over my own feet and a step and as he rolls his eyes I stumble upright and regret the truth of the statement.
He replies You're not high maintenance.
"She meant emotionally."
But, I would be fascinated to meet the person who is unguarded from the first instant, always. Who doesn't measure themselves out, dose by dose, seemingly relaxed but judging every movement minute message.
And now we are here, and giving of yourself is comfortable, in a manner.
And it is good, despite the gift.